Thoughts on Death and Dying

What follows is an assortment of thoughts and observations about death and dying. 

• We need more open and honest conversations about death.
• To be able to vividly look back on one's life, and to look forward coherently when one is dying is a gift.
• Death is a non-exciting event. It's a lot of sitting around, lying around, being fed, bathed, toileted, medicated. It's a slow process.
• Death is exhausting, both for the individual dying, and for the loved ones and caregivers. Systems shut down gradually, and caregivers adjust to meet the needs of the patient.
• Even reading and watching TV are usually too much work for patients.
• We should study death. We should spend time with people who are dying to combat our ignorance about how it actually happens. 
• The lack of control you feel when you're dying is terrifying. 
• The idea of putting yourself out of your own misery provides some level of comfort. 
• Contemplating dying on a daily basis is not necessarily a good thing, but keeping our own death always in mind is helpful. 
• Knowing I will die helps me to have more kindness in my conversations with my family, coworkers, even strangers at the store. It helps me enjoy things more in the present. It helps me prioritize how I want to spend my time and to let go of things that I feel are a waste of my time. It helps me realize it is all finite and it all can be over faster than I think.
• Death is the most significant and consequential thing that will happen to us after our birth. 
• Life is fragile and death is random, but despite that, life is the greatest blessing. 
• I want to do the things I want to do, now. I don't want to die full of regret or grudges. 
• For my funeral, I would like a lot of food, drink and people saying kind things about me.